Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Weekly Five Countdown

I just got this idea from a blog called Bookish Penguin. She calls hers Monday Five Countdown.

Five things I'm grateful for
1. My dogs- they bring me so much joy.

2. My friends - they are there for me whenever I need them

3. Christmas is this weekend and I get to spend all of Christmas Eve at church. No better place to be.

4. That I am finished with my shopping except for one gift card.

5. That I am off work for 2 weeks

Four Things I Can't Stop Thinking About

1. The things I am going to do this week

2. Finding peace in my life.

3. Organizing my "things" and getting rid of a lot of "things"

4. Marriage and babies

Three Things I Want To Accomplish This Week

1. Finishing my shopping

2. Clean

3. relax

Two Things I Am Working To Be Positive About

1. My family dynamics

2. My self

One Random Thing

My garage door is driving me crazy. It will not stay down. I must call my landlord.

Read more: http://www.bookishpenguin.com/blog/2010/11/15/monday-five-countdown-now-with-participation.html#ixzz18oDx4yHB

Under Creative Commons License: Attribution Non-Commercial No Derivatives

Saturday, November 27, 2010

One of these days

One day I hope to find peace with myself and my life. I hope to love me for me. The Tim McGraw lyrics say it all.

Now everybody stands up

The congregation sings

It's a song of sweet forgiveness

And as the chorus rings

The wind blows clear my memory

The pages start to turn

And suddenly I'm singing

The moment that I learn

One of these days I'm gonna love me

And feel the joy of sweet release

One of these days I'll rise above me

And at last I'll find some peace

And then I'm gonna smile a little

And maybe even laugh a little

But one of these days...

I'm gonna love me

Wednesday, June 2, 2010


Why? Why do I do these things to myself? Why do I ask about things I don't really want to know about?
When my mom is doing things or is with people I don't want to know about, I ask anyway.

The recent is asking about a friends daughter who is pregnant. I want to know she is feeling good. But then hearing all about he pregnancy and dute date etc and feeling her belly ...makes me cry. I am jealous, there I said it......

Why can't I just get over these things?
Blog update

Saturday, February 20, 2010


I am tired of always being the single one at the party. I feel like such a child. Will I ever be with someone? I am also tired of being tired and sad and fatigued and fat. Tired, tired, tired.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

A new adventure awaits!

Next year I am going to be teaching vocal music at a new middle school. I am so excited and yet it does not seem real. I have only worked at one school amd I love the people there! I will miss them so much, but I know those who are my friends will remain my friends!!

Monday, February 1, 2010

A Brand New Start??

I had an interview today for a new music teaching job. This is for a choir director in a middle school. I feel like the interview went well. But, you never know what the principal wants and is thinking. I would to do something different. I have enjoyed elementary teaching but would love to do more choral than general music. I love the staff where I am, which has made this decision difficult. But now that I am over that, I really hope I get the job!

Friday, January 29, 2010


I am so obsessed with the musical "Wicked." I was lucky enough to see it twice when it came to Kansas City. I bought tickets with my sister and a friend (who did not know I bought tickets) bought tickets for my birthday! I sat in the orchestra section both times! I saw it the year before that and really liked it, but now... I think it helped sitting closer, I could see the expressions on the performers faces. After the first show I looked up Marcie Dodd and Helene Yorke on the internet. Sound like great people and I have been following the actresses and wicked online ever since! I listen to the CD all the time. Wishing the touring cast had their own CD of the show! Anyway.... if you haven't seen the show, I highly recommend you go if it is coming to a theatre near you!

Saturday, January 16, 2010


I met my precious 9 month old cousin, Adelynn. She was baptized on Sunday, Jan. 10th. It was the first time I met Adelynn because she is very sick. The doctors don't know why, which I think is totally frustrating.She is pretty much nonresponsive. She has seizures, which are better. She has a feeding tube but will also eat some baby food. She has never shown expression, barely opens her eyes and can't hold up her head. This my cousin Richard and his wife's first child. I hope and pray they can find out what is going on so she can get better, if that is possible.As a present for her baptism, I made an altered letter "A." I put her name on the "A" with stickers and also the baptism date, I added a cross charm that hung in the circle of the "A."

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Maybe it's not meant to be.

LOVE! I haven't found it. I am 38 and I have not ever been in love. I am a normal person (whatever that is). I am a teacher, I have worked towards a masters, I live on my own, I'm intelligent....
Maybe it is not meant to be. I have worked on my issues about my dad, self-esteem etc. I know I am not the only one with issues and those people find love. I don't get it. Most everyone in my life met their love in college or through a friend or it was their neighbor. I don't just run into men like that. I have to work on it. I have given up for a while because "it will happen when you least except it." Right, why do I have to least expect it? Why can't I just meet him? Maybe love is not meant for me!

Another cold day in Kansas City

I love being able to hang out at home with nothing to do. However it has been too many days. Feeling lazy and gross. I am actually ready to go back to work. I teach for a week and then we have a day off for MLK.
I have been able to get stuff done around the house. I organized, cleaned, and did some scrapbooking.
Right now I am enjoying a cup of coffee with my pups snuggled together on my lap. I love that!

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Creative Therapy - catalyst number ninety-five

This is my first post for Creative Therapy. What is something I have struggled with? It seems like I am always searching for who I am. Maybe I just don't think who I am is good enough? Or maybe I am afraid that I am not who others think I am. Maybe it shouldn't matter? When will I just be at peace?

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Need a change

Had a work meeting today. I was so not into it. I am ready for teaching a different age. I hope I get the job!

Sunday, January 3, 2010

A tough few days

The last few days before my winter break ended has stunk. A family friend died from a heart attack. She was 81. I have known her as far back as I remember. I am so sad. Life goes by so fast. It had been too long since I have seen her and that makes me sad too. I will miss you Ruth. I hope you know how much I love you. I have 30 years of memories that I will hold on to always.