Faith

Faith
Webster's New World Dictionary:
"Unquestioning belief that does not require proof or evidence"

BIBLE DEFINITION:(taken from learnthebible.org) Taking God at His word. Paul says in Romans 10:17 Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God. It is full confidence in God's word. FAITH accepts God's word (His promises and His warnings) as FACT and acts accordingly. Since there are many evidences that the word of God is true, this is not a blind leap of faith. It is rather an intelligent, holy reaction to the wondrous words of God.

Faith is something I struggle with. I think everyone struggles with it from time to time. Along with faith comes trust. You got it, I struggle with that too. Trust is a big one for me on many levels. "Trust" is my word this year. I read on another blog about focusing on a word for a year. So I have been focusing on trust through different excercises(I won't go into that now).

I have such a peace about adopting! This is where faith and trust come in. I need to have faith that it truly is right. I have had this feeling before about other things and they have happened. But I am always scared to trust the feeling. Then when the positive feeling comes true I tell myself to trust the feeling next time it happens. And yet....

Does this peace mean I have no worries? I wish!! What I am going to try to do is put those positive vibes out there. Put out what I want in this adoption and have faith in God. Faith that what is in my heart is what he has placed there and it is going to happen how I feel it is going to happen. I am going to TRUST this is Him taking control(As I write this that stupid little voice is saying don't trust it. You are going to get hurt). It's a work in progress!

Maybe it's not meant to be.

LOVE! I haven't found it. I am 38 and I have not ever been in love. I am a normal person (whatever that is). I am a teacher, I have worked towards a masters, I live on my own, I'm intelligent....
Maybe it is not meant to be. I have worked on my issues about my dad, self-esteem etc. I know I am not the only one with issues and those people find love. I don't get it. Most everyone in my life met their love in college or through a friend or it was their neighbor. I don't just run into men like that. I have to work on it. I have given up for a while because "it will happen when you least except it." Right, why do I have to least expect it? Why can't I just meet him? Maybe love is not meant for me!